If I were to ask you how you are, could you answer like this? ‘Brilliant! I am fantastic!’
Maybe it is not the truth. Would you say it anyway, even if it meant you would be telling a lie?
When we are not well, or we have a pain somewhere in our body, or we are not sleeping well at night (and let’s face it, we can all benefit from a better night sleep), we can get into a comforting routine of talking about it regularly – especially if it is a recurring or ongoing problem.
We are aware in ourselves that we are not 100%, and sometimes we also want our friends or family to be aware of what’s happening. Or we are completely distracted by the issue and we can’t switch off (perhaps we don’t allow ourselves to).
We all know that as we get older we don’t allow ourselves to feel joy as readily as children. We make a non-verbal commitment with ourselves to not live in the present moment – to be always thinking, worrying, reflecting, analyzing, evaluating, or feeling guilty for not being enough and doing more.
Why it’s not healthy to exaggerate your problems
Of course, most physical unhealthiness is caused by emotional unhealthiness or dis-ease.
To get better, the first thing we usually focus on is exploring and resolving why we are sick, in pain, or not sleeping well on a physical level. We apply ‘topical’ pain-relief and use solutions that give us immediate physical relief.
There is another thing we can do to get better for a longer term – it is a bit more awkward to acknowledge and is something we don’t focus on enough. It involves exploring and resolving your emotional need for being unwell and understanding your emotional need to talk about it.
Do you want to believe yourself that you are not 100%?
– What will you gain, what will you not be able to do, what will you have to do instead?
– How does being unwell, in pain, or sleep deprived, change your life in a GOOD way?
Do you want others to believe you are not 100%, and if so – why?
– What will you gain if others are sympathetic and are treating you carefully?
– Will they expect less of you, give you more, make special plans and allowances for you?
– What would happen if you told them you were brilliant?
Answering these questions can help you to figure out your underlying emotional need for attracting the recurring/ongoing illness, pain or sleep trouble and to feel more at ease.
Self-healing to live stronger
Naturally happier life is easy when you decide to take ownership of your health and you feel empowered to heal yourself. I have written several articles on self-healing and empowered thinking – specially written for parents – and they are available for FREE in our wellness program.
Once you know how to find and address the reason for becoming unwell and talking about it with others, you will free yourself of repetitive sickness/sleep deprivation as you can heal yourself.
Imagine if you felt empowered and your child learned from your example how to self-heal, too. It would be fantastic to hear young children answer, ‘Brilliant,’ and to smile this enthusiastically all the way into their adult years.
Children are born with a very strong link between emotional and physical health and are exceptional at manifesting and creating their life based on their emotions. We can help them hold onto this skill that they bring into their new life. I believe parents can nurture this exceptional trait by acknowledging the link between their child’s emotions and their physical health, and even learn from it.
How to apply this powerful message for our children’s health
Learning how to open your mind to emotional needs for becoming unwell will help you identify why your child is becoming unwell. Even though our children may not be able to explain what is troubling them emotionally, you can use a different set of questions in a calm and loving environment to help them understand their own body’s reactions.
I asked my son why he had a sore foot, a complaint he repeatedly mentioned, and he answered that he twisted it. He became animated while he explained exactly how he did it.
We delved deeper into what he couldn’t do because of this sore foot, and I gently asked him where he didn’t want to go. We eventually realized he was afraid of the kinder gym because of the hard tasks he was being asked to do.
I already knew he was out of his comfort zone from his changed personality at kinder gym, even though he had been trying his very best. The continuous talk of kinder gym at home resulted in several accidents involving his feet and legs.
This was 6 weeks ago. We cancelled kinder gym and his ‘alternate personality’ and sore legs and the accidents causing them have been gone since.
This is not a far-stretch of the imagination. The guidance that I receive from my inner voice has helped me time and time again to understand the emotional trauma my son is going through, that creates physical problems such as leg injury, recurring colds, eczema and other injuries.
It is plausible that children suffer from continual viruses, ear-infections and disturbed sleep because they have an emotional need for the condition, and they need the changes that come about because of the condition. A simple emotional and physical need of a child is to rest and grow. Continual viruses could be your child’s way of expressing this need. Keeping the number of hours at playgroups limited to a few hours is healthiest.
By learning the above techniques, we have been been able to maintain better health overall. And this is better for the whole family.
The universe listens to all our thoughts and words and feels the energy, and the universe delivers more of the same. Brilliance is an (obviously) ideal feeling, wouldn’t you say?
Joanna Becker, Author and Wellness Medium
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